What We Really Want: Conversations About Connection
If it's true that "...the opposite of addiction is not sobriety...the opposite of addiction is connection," there are lots of people who need to discover what true, healthy connection looks like. Whether the struggle is with addiction, toxic relationship dynamics, or something else, we've all tried to meet our needs in some really unhealthy ways. Way too often, the things we run to for comfort leave us feeling even more disconnected and alone than before.
Through conversations about the many ways we can connect, this podcast offers an invitation to discover and start getting what we really want, so we can live the lives we were created for.
Awaken (awakenrecovery.com) helps men and women whose lives have been wrecked by unwanted/addictive sexual behaviors and sexual betrayal trauma. We hope the podcast will help not only those struggling sexually, but anyone who seeks healthier ways of finding connection.
What We Really Want: Conversations About Connection
23 | Carol Sheets (aka "Carol the Coach"): The Gift of Empathy
"Send us a message! (questions, feedback, etc.)"
People being introduced to today's wealth of resources for sexual addiction and sexual betrayal trauma recovery owe a lot to our guest. Carol Sheets, also known to her radio, podcast, and YouTube audiences as "Carol the Coach," was among the first therapists to become a Certified Sexual Addiction Therapist (CSAT). For years she has been offering encouragement, advice, and resources not only for recovering sex addicts, but also for their partners recovering from betrayal trauma.
In 2019 Carol released Help Her Heal: An Empathy Workbook for Sex Addicts to Help Their Partners Heal. This was a simple, practical guide to help recovering addicts understand the pain their partners experience with sexual betrayal, and to give them tools to develop the needed skill of empathy.
Carol also created a model for couple's recovery called ERCEM (Early Recovery Couple's Empathy Model), understanding that for couples who have experienced sexual addiction and betrayal to heal, BOTH partners eventually need to discover empathy for the other's past experiences with trauma. Her 2022 book Help Them Heal: Teaching You Both How to Heal Your Relationship After Sexual Betrayal, helps couples navigate this difficult work and understand that there is hope for couples after sexual betrayal.
Some of the "initials" we talked about in the episode include:
CSAT - Certified Sexual Addiction Therapist
APSATS - Association of Partners of Sex Addicts Trauma Specialists
ERCEM - Early Recovery Couple's Empathy Model
AVR - Acknowledge, Validate, Reassure (empathetic communication skill)
Greg & Stacey had a great conversation where Carol shared how she got started, how she remains committed to learning newer and better ways to help people, and she even took some time to talk through a recent trigger Stacey experienced. We're grateful for the lifetime of work Carol brings to people in recovery, and we believe you will be too.
#carolsheets #carolthecoach #helpherheal #helpthemheal #empathy #ercem #apsats #grace #awaken #awakenrecovery #awakenpodcast #whatwereallywant #wwrw #connection #conversation
Carol The Coach's website
Carol's books (on Amazon)
Sexual Addiction: Strength/Hope/Recovery (Carol's podcast)
Awaken website
Roots Retreat Men's Intensive
Roots Retreat Women's Workshop
Awaken Men & Women's support meeting info (including virtual)
